All in!

I've been thinking a lot about poker lately, probably because I have a trip planned to Atlantic City with my brother. I've always loved poker, and thought I was pretty good at it, but lately I've had to wonder. I was in a game the other night with a few buddies, well, like three buddies and two of their buddies, people I had just met. First off, I knew I could beat my friends, because they still look at poker as gambling, but I had heard that one of the other guys was pretty good. Well as it turns out, he wasn't as good as he thought he was, however, neither was I. I ended up $20 ahead after playing for like 5 hours. It was a weird structure, but it was the game they had been playing well before I ever showed up, so I didn't complain. They did one $1 blind, no small blind. It didn't really change much, but it was just odd.

I bought in for $40, and at one point was up to maybe $150, but then I made two incredibly stupid mistakes and ended up cashing out $60. By the end of the night there were only three of us left, myself, and two of the guys I had just met. One guy was drunk and reckless, so when I thought he was bluffing me, I pushed all in with middle pair and an open ended straight draw. Well, he already had the straight. The then proceeded to tell me what a bad play that was. "Listen jackass, I knew that already." The other situation was pretty much the same, but this time it was against the guy who claimed to be the subject matter expert of the game. This guy is in love with himself, for real. He spent the night telling us stories of all of his successes, "ok hot shot, why are you playing some screwed up $0/$1 no limit poker game with us then?" Anyway, I thought he was putting me to the test one time because we had been clashing all night, so I called, he had the better hand. Oh well, as stupid as those moves were, at least they now no I won't lay down to their aggression like the others will.

As you can probably tell, I'm not the happiest with my play, but if I get the chance I'll definitely make up for it the next time we play. I am going to redeposit on Full Tilt pretty soon so I can practice up for Atlantic City. I just don't want to lose money because of lack of preparation.

So, in other news, I reached one of my blog goals. I checked my google analytics today and found that I have had 1,127 visitors, I set a goal about two months ago of having 1,000 visitors, so it feels good to reach that. Although, it doesn't mean quite as much because my bounce rate clearly shows that most people aren't staying long enough to read even one post. That is the good and the bad of Entrecard. It will definitely get you traffic, but I bet there are only one or two people out of a hundred who will actually read anything you write. I am guilty of it too. Of all the people who I drop on, I only read a handfull of them. And the only ones I read pretty consistently are www.charleshamel.com, and www.paulezimmerman.com. They are both good blogs for anyone out there who hasn't checked them out, you definitely should. Well, not much else to tell, I just felt like a journal entry and figured I could share it.

Get out of your mind, get into your soul.

Does it get any better than Billy Ocean? I mean really… ”get out of my dreams, get into my car!...beep beep, beep beep, yea yea.” I love it. I am totally serious, there isn’t a bit of facetiousness in this statement at all, I love Billy Ocean. I think it has a lot to do with what I relate his music to, and that is, 80’s movies staring the “Coreys.” If you are a child of the 80’s like me, then you know exactly what I’m talking about. “Lost Boys” made me want to hunt vampires, and “License to Drive” made learning to drive seem like the absolute pinnacle of the human experience.

All that being said, I haven’t been able to nail down any real solid blogs lately, so I figured something was better than nothing. In keeping with my whole, “writer’s block” blog, I figured I should just start typing and see what comes out. Maybe the Muses have something to say if I just give them the opportunity. I just so happened to be listening to a mixed play list when I started this, and it is set to “random” so...we’ll trust the universe to see where it sends us. I started with, as you may have guessed, Billy Ocean. Isn’t the power of music amazing? I am a lyric guy; some people are more into the tunes, the instruments, all of that, I can’t tell what is “good music” and what isn’t, my ear isn’t that discerning, but my gut is, and I know when there is a message in the lyrics that I need to be taking note of.

Take for instance, “Crazy” by Gnarls Barkley, you guessed it, that’s what just came on. It’s a damn catchy tune, and I bobbed my head to it a few times before I really listened, but even as much of a “feel good” song as this is, it can teach us if we are open to it. I would venture to guess that most of you have never dissected the song like I have, but if you do; you might be amazed at what you’ll find.

…I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that phase…
…Yeah, I was out of touch
But it wasn't because I didn't know enough
I just knew too much…
…You really think you're in control
Well, I think you're crazy…
…My heroes had the heart to lose their lives out on a limb
And all I remember is thinking, I want to be like them
Ever since I was little, ever since I was little it looked like fun
And it's no coincidence I've come
And I can die when I'm done…

It’s an amazing song when you look at what is being said. I’m sure that a lot of you are familiar with meditation in various forms; if not, then let me explain a little something about it. One of the chief reasons to practice meditation is to clear away the clutter of the mind, the gunk that gets in the way of true perception, and real experience. A typical mind is dirty and cluttered; think of it like a dirty windshield, your vision is skewed. Meditation is a means to clean the glass so you can actually see the world as it truly is. Some people have referred to it as, “losing your mind to come to your senses,” which basically just means, stop thinking so much and just experience. When you sit, just sit, when you eat, just eat, etc. To me, that is exactly the lesson being taught in this song.

He is talking about how before he was out of touch because he “knew” too much, his perception was skewed by his programming. He goes on to say, “you really think you’re in control...,” I think that in this line he is referring to the natural order of things, our place in the flow, which we have little control of. The last part about his heroes losing their lives out on a limb, well that’s just beautiful. He is talking about putting yourself out there, and having faith in the Universe, in your God, or whatever it is you put faith in, and daring to put yourself out there in pursuit of what you feel you need to do. Finally, the line that states “and it’s no coincidence I’ve come, and I can die when I’m done…” …..wow, that line is really profound. That is yet another statement of his faith in a higher order, a method to the madness if you will, and his understanding of his role in it. Once he has completed his part, he will move on.

Now, the question is, did Gnarls know that his music contained such profound truths? Honestly, I have no idea, maybe, maybe not, but it doesn’t really matter, because it reminded me of what I need to remember, and I doubt I’m the only one. I think that is the point that I’ve come to, although I didn’t know where I was headed when I started this blog. We can learn from anything, everyone is our teacher, every situation is a lesson, every place is a classroom. You don’t have to track down a “guru” there are plenty of them hiding in plain sight. All you have to do is open yourself to truth, no matter where it chooses to present itself.